May 5, 2020

7:20pm, Roland Avenue and W 34th Street, Baltimore, MD

Today has been bizarre. I went to work for roughly 6 hours for a tree removal. I'm glad the rain is holding off for now. I chose to walk to Hampden. Along the way, I envisioned the post office parking lot and settled on it before arriving. I did some improv warming up. My legs are tight from biking yesterday... I didn't stretch and I'm paying for it today. I am feeling more deliberate today in my dancing. Still curious and fighting reactionary impulses at the same time. I thought about the inherent performative aspect of this work. I think performing feels scary. If I stay in a state of research, conclusions can continue to shift. Improv is a safety net. That's a new thought for me. It's always felt "liberating" to a certain extent. I am learning to control my improv and use more intention as a choreographic tool. How much space exists between choreography and improvisation? Are the divisions between the two contrasting or subtle? I feel a yearning... the focus of which changes throughout the day. Day one hundred twenty-six.